A Free Association Inaugural Post

Are we having fun yet?

No. We are not. Too much tech stuff. Not enough pictures of lampshades perched on the heads of llamas. I’m following the video tutorial step by step for a first post, so the life will be half-sucked out of it every step of the way anyhow.

*sigh*

Welcome grasshopper, to the world of websites and blogging.

Why did you begin this post with a plural pronoun and are now referring to yourself in the third person?

I’m pretending to have an audience. Kind of like Robert DeNiro in “The King of Comedy” where at the end he’s doing his shtick in his apartment; his audience a room full of cardboard cutouts. Although I have managed to rope one of Jo’s good friends Davilyn into reading this stuff under the guise of making sure it works. Davilyn had fascinating travels and she’s also been to Pompeii, just like we’ve! She followed us and commented on facebook the whole way. She’s a smart lady and we both like her. Thanks Davilyn! I just emailed you $100,000!!!! Ha! Ha! Now I’ll know if she read this or not! The funds are in the email! Check your junk folder! No? Uhhhh… must be a problem with the servers! I have no idea why I was using the third person.

Alright, enough of the lesson on headers already. What’s next? Okay, this just became a bit more fun because I’m supposed to add a link. Let’s try this one. I didn’t stay long because I saw “Videodrome” and “The Ring” and didn’t want to develop a malignant brain tumor or die seven days after viewing that deceptively innocuous optical illusion or… whatever. What? Now video tutorial man is telling me that a post should have lots of links. Now I’ll have to go back and put links in for all those movie references. If he’s started with links instead of going on about headers… the nerve of this guy.

The video tutorial guy now commands me to “add media” in the form of a picture. Instinctively, I want to rebel against this pushy abuse of authority but I figure I’d best comply or maybe he won’t help me anymore. Let’s see… add media… upload picture… divide by the square of the hypotenuse… carry the three…nought nought… insert into post. Good thing this didn’t involve “gozintas,” as in “six gozinta 18 thricely.” Never been very good at “gozintas.” Man, I miss the Beverly Hillbillies, the television sitcom equivalent of a Michelin three star meal that has never been released as a collection beyond the first three seasons. It’s a disgrace, I tells ya!

I have to check and see if the internet style guide allows me to drop the quotation marks around the names or films and the like. Ah, using italics is acceptable so that’s what I’ll use… from now on.

Okay then. I have a picture with a caption which is good… but I’ve GOT to talk about this picture if for no other reason than to shut down the uppity video tutorial guy for a while. He’s just so impatient and I like prefer a more sedate pace.

Disclaimer: I tell everyone to consider the captions of any photos I have as “false news” because I’m just goofin around. They’re meant to generate a smile and any actual information transmitted is purely accidental. In this particular instance, this is supposed to be a true story, but in fact it is not so it is indeed, false news.

Back to the Foreign Affairs restaurant. Oh sorry. It’s the Restaurant Foreign Affairs according to the interwebsite in which the restaurant resides and not the Foreign Affairs Restaurant. Mybad.

So I have to wonder, is this the place diplomats dine? Are there shadowy conversations in dim, candlelit corners involving state secrets and the like? Who cares. What’s on the menu? 23 Euro for Knuspriges Schwarzfederhuhn???? That’s just outrageous! You can get a box of knuspriges schwarzfederhuhn at Costco for like… $20 and there are three in a box! I know they’re frozen, but just the same. If you have gugelhupf for dessert, that’s like another 9 euro. Geez. The English translation on the menu for gugelhupf is… gugelhupf. Now I’m forced into yet another gratuitous link! Let’s just bring up a picture.

That’s not a cake, it’s a hat! Were it a hat then I’d pay nine euro. Well… that’s the end of the lesson and my attention span.

Before I go and in case anyone blunders into this post aside from Davilyn and you’re wondering what this insanity is all about, here’s a link to my about page! Man, this post is going to require heavy editing after the fact.